Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
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