Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Randomize