her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Randomize