Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
