We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
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