ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
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