Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Randomize
