yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Randomize
