The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
