Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
this beer tastes like vomit already
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
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