Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
