problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
There r osticjed everywhere
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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