Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize