i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
