Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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