well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
