Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
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