Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
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