i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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