Texts From Last Night

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  (314): View more from Missouri

  I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical

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  (314): I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical http://tfl.nu/2sib
  Replies (2) Good night (797) Bad night (1582)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended

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  (520): chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended http://tfl.nu/y5kg
  Replies (13) Good night (3433) Bad night (1119)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.

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  (717): please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are. http://tfl.nu/a3si
  Replies (10) Good night (1476) Bad night (3876)
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade

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  (+61): This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade http://tfl.nu/eefh
  Replies (14) Good night (6578) Bad night (806)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.

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  (770): His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution. http://tfl.nu/sbqf
  Replies (21) Good night (6213) Bad night (1103)
• Favorite

  (386): View more from Florida

  being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.

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  (386): being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop. http://tfl.nu/b39q
  Replies (15) Good night (2810) Bad night (1413)
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.

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  (904): Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically. http://tfl.nu/529h
  Replies (6) Good night (1552) Bad night (886)
• Favorite

  (562): View more from California

  I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service

  (562): View more from California

  And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.

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  (562): I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service (562): And I got $4 when somebody made it rain. http://tfl.nu/btbw
  Replies (4) Good night (2690) Bad night (1333)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.

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  (715): She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee. http://tfl.nu/wutx
  Replies (7) Good night (1852) Bad night (1025)
• Favorite

  (971): View more from Oregon

  Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?

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  (971): Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life? http://tfl.nu/shks
  Replies (11) Good night (870) Bad night (3088)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?

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  (317): do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards? http://tfl.nu/y683
  Replies (16) Good night (2258) Bad night (1104)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.

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  (336): He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it. http://tfl.nu/p4ei
  Replies (6) Good night (889) Bad night (1003)
• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol

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  (918): I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol http://tfl.nu/o8ad
  Replies (2) Good night (642) Bad night (368)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese

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  (614): I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese http://tfl.nu/xpqp
  Replies (2) Good night (855) Bad night (374)
• Favorite

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet

  (770): View more from Georgia

  What is my life?

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  (901): The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet (770): What is my life? http://tfl.nu/abv3
  Replies (3) Good night (444) Bad night (528)

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