remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Randomize
