I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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