I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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