We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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