You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Randomize