so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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