I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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