Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Randomize
