We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
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