Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
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Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
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He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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