you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
