Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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