I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
