There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
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He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
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I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
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