Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
