Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
