if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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