She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize