You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Randomize
