is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies