I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
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he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
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I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.