And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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