I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
