he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Randomize
