i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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