so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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