the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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