let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Randomize
