grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Randomize
