Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize
