Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize
