wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
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