I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Randomize